为什么交朋友总是失望?
Actually, it's not that others have changed.
It's because you initially imagined the other person to be too perfect.
Many people make a common mistake in interpersonal relationships.
When you first meet someone, you think they are perfect and trustworthy.
But when she discovered his flaws one day, she began to feel disappointed, even thinking, "So this is the kind of person he is."
因为我们习惯用非黑即白的方式看人。
不是好人,就是坏人;
不是优秀,就是失败;
不是朋友,就是敌人。
The Kui hexagram in the I Ching speaks of the differences and disagreements between people.
Many conflicts don't arise because the other person has become worse.
Rather, it's when we discover that we have differences and shortcomings that...
This leads to conflict, and even complete rejection of the other side.
However, what the Kui hexagram truly wants to tell us is...
不是排斥差异,而是接受「和而不同」。
People are never exactly the same; they are different.
This does not mean that anyone is right or wrong.
另一方面,同人卦讲的是 人与人如何建立关系。
真正的「同」,不是要求别人和自己完全一样,
也不是把对方理想化,
Instead, it is about recognizing each other's shared values.
They are also able to accept each other's differences.
阴中有阳,阳中有阴;
有优点的人,也会有缺点;
曾经犯错的人,也可能拥有善良的一面。
A truly mature person
I won't condemn someone entirely just because I see their flaws;
We will not blindly worship someone just because of their merits.
✅When judging people, consider the whole picture; ✅When getting along with others, leave room for maneuver.
✅Accept that others have gray areas, ✅and remind yourself that you also have gray areas.
Because none of us are perfect.
When you stop defining others in black and white, you'll find that...
There is less disappointment and less conflict between people.
True wisdom
不是把人分成好与坏,而是 #看懂人性的复杂;
True maturity is not about demanding perfection from others, but about learning to find common ground in differences and to tolerate differences within those commonalities.
This is the wisdom of life that the Book of Changes teaches us.
